Turning pages to new chapters

It took me a few days to post this since it was so hard the other night. My daughter is a senior and had her last studio dance recital the other night. Needless to say I cried. It has been such a great journey that we have enjoyed together. I am lucky. She has always wanted me to go to the studio with her, go to competitions, and watch her dance in the living room. I am truly going to miss all of this. I am so grateful for her wonderful studio, Main Motion in Oakley, Idaho, the teachers, friends and teammates. I am looking forward to watching her next chapter of life unfold as she minors in dance education and choreography and majors in physical therapy. Dance has truly been a blessing in not only her life, but mine as well.

Scars

Scars are a reminder of an old wound.  Unfortunately they are always there to remind us of the pain we once felt.  Emotional scars are the same way. They remind us of past pains.  Sometimes we think we have made it past the hurt and have forgiven anyone involved and then you see someone who was a part of that scarring and the pain comes running back in again.  It is so hard...I can understand why forgiving is such a big deal and that it is a continual struggle to let go of those scars and to move on, being the Christ-like person we would like to be.  I, myself, struggled with this this weekend.  I question, why do I feel so angry still?  And then, another incident from the past popped up.  Both of these incidents were things that hurt my girls.  I have decided that there is no wrath like the wrath of a Mom and that I need to pray to get over these things.  I really did not think I was the type of person to hold a grudge....but now that I recognize it...I must change it!  And I will through prayer and forgiveness!

Never Give Up

Wow so today I finally past my last Math Test for WGU.  I am working on my Masters in Math Education  and although I still have another year left of school, today was my last Math Test for my Masters.  I am not ashamed to say that this was the 4th time I took this test.  It was the hardest test I have ever taken in my life. 

I have studied so hard but I know I could not have passed it without the Lord's help.  I know He guided me to the important things I needed to study and guided me through the test.  I am so grateful for my kids patience with me...I have been really stressed out and grouchy.  Thank you everyone for your prayers!

March Afternoon with the Girls

So I am sitting out here on my front porch with both my girls enjoying  the March afternoon.  I love it because we don't do this a whole lot together due to our busy schedules.  So today we took out our $10 Wal Mart bucket grill (it is 4 years old now and still works great) , hot dogs, marshmallows, chips, chocolate bars, and graham crackers.

We started out the day going to see Patricia's attorney.  So on our way home Aly said we should go on a ride like we used to in the old days.  (When the girls were little we would just hop in the car and drive.  We would come to an intersection and choose left or right. We ended up in some really unusual places and had a great time in the process).  Today we ended up at Milner Dam. We joked and laughed.  We really didn't talk about anything in particular which was nice.  No stress...just fun.

So now here we are enjoying hot dogs and smores on the deck ...funny...now all three of us are on a computer, swinging on the porch swings...lol..

I love days like this...I want to hold on to these moments forever - and I will.  We will.

Hi...well I am not one for keeping a journal but I this could be a good time in my life to start writing things down.  I really don't care if anyone reads this...it is open if any one wants to but keep in mind they are just thoughts.

I am very lucky to have two beautiful girls.   I am so proud of them.  Raising them has been the most rewarding yet difficult, exciting yet challenging  journey one could ever imaging going on.

They have brought me so much joy but have also been the result of so much sadness.  I do  not mean that in a negative way.  I mean that every mother has their happiness wrapped up in whether their children are happy, and in the choices they make.  My kids, not unlike myself, have made both good and bad choices.  They both have endured illnesses at sometime in their life, and I am glad to say that both of them rose above them all.

I would not change anything about my girls.  Their journeys have made them who they are and me who I am.  Seriously, I feel like have have grown up with them.  I know that may sound odd but it is so true.  Oh, if I only knew what I know now when I first became a mother, I would have been amazing...maybe that is why Grandparents are so awesome!

Talking about Grandparents, my own parents have the been the best to my girls.  They are so much a part of their lives.  We are very lucky to have them.

My girls are now 20 and 18.  I don't know when that happened - it seems that I just blinked and they went from cute little girls to these beautiful young women.  Since both girls have a strong testimony of their Father in Heaven and Jesus Christ, I know they are ready to face the world on their own.

The question is...am I ready?